Sunday, March 13, 2011

Each Sunday I will get a little bit stronger...

Tonight at 2:15 a.m. it will be two weeks since our precious Hadley came into this world and then left to be with our Redeemer.  

I have a feeling Sunday nights are going to be hard on me for awhile.  Sunday, February 27th was a very hard day and night for me.  I was in pain and scared of what what going to happen next.  I remember looking at Daniel with tears in my eyes and telling him that I knew it was going to happen tonight.  He was so amazing to me, and just kept saying it's God's plan and played "Bring the Rain" for me over and over and over again :)  I haven't talked a lot on here about everything that led up to Hadley's birth that night and I probably won't.  I struggle with getting mad at myself for not being able to keep her in and safe inside me.  I know it isn't my fault but as a Mom you have that instinct to protect and I of course felt that the moment I found out I was pregnant with Hadley.  

 So, needless to say Sunday's are hard.  But how can I be angry with Sunday's when in the early hours of Monday morning our precious little girl was born??  I had to get through Sunday in order to see my sweet little girl and then kiss her goodbye.  Sunday's are going to make me stronger...God has blessed me with Sunday's.  

Love this song by Sara Evans...some of the lyrics do not apply (she was going through a divorce) but I love this part the best.  It explains exactly what I am feeling right now.

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

I know I have shared about Angie Smith's blog Bring the Rain in another post and how that song has gotten me through a lot these past two months.  Well a good friend of my Mom's mailed her Angie Smith's book, I Will Carry You, for my Mom and I to read and my Mom brought it to me tonight!!  I am so excited to read it.  I had it in the back of my mind to get this book ordered and here it is.  God is always taking care of us.

Daniel, Briley, and I got home on Friday night from our Healing Trip to Hot Springs, AR. We had such a great time being together...God gave us a lot of restful time and I loved enjoying our time just the three of us.  I'm going to share in my next post a lot more pictures from our trip but here are a few of my favorites.

Have a blessed week!!

In Christ's Love,


Anonymous said...

I pray God surrounds you with precious thoughts of your baby girl. God must have a very special plan for her and your family. Praying for you!

Natasha said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Much love and prayers to you as you move forward.